Steve's China Adventure

Prime Minister Stephen Harper has announced he will visit China, an event heralded by Chinese media as "the most exciting since the visit of Richard Nixon."

The PM has been studying intensely for this important meeting with the world's fastest growing economic power. He has been rehearsing "Chopsticks" at the keyboard, learning Confuciunisms from old Charlie Chan movies ("John Baird," he says, "can be Number One Son"), and ordering dim sum in the parliamentary dining room. His favorite dish is chicken feet. "Chicken feet," he laughs, "that's what I used to call Dion and Ignatieff." 

He had been hoping to sing "On a Slow Boat to China" in Beijing,  but the estate of composer Frank Loesser has secured an injunction preventing this. Instead, he will perform a song of his own, one chorus of which follows: 

 "While you folks strive and toil

  We're the ones who've got the oil.

  You and me should have a chat

  When we get the stuff to Kitimat."