Post-Game Haiku

Downcast eleven
Fly across the sea so blue
In silver sorrow.

Haiku and Soccer

This is the day for the 2015 Championship Match in FIFA Women's World Soccer, with Japan and the USA meeting on the pitch at BC Place.

The leading booster for the American team will be Vice-President Joe Biden, but the Japanese--current world champions--are not without stellar boosters, for in the stands today will be Kato Yamaguchi, Poet Laureate of Sam's Sake & Sushi Bar, and his companion, the still lovely Miss Cherry Blossom 1996.

"For the occasion," said Kato, "I have composed a haiku which I believe will help bring victory to our noble ladies. I will recite it for you now:

"Sun bright on the pitch
Fleet young figures dart with grace
Suddenly, they strike!"

See you at BC Place. Don't forget the sun screen.

Okay, so it's just the start of the season...

...but even so, can we see a pattern developing? In recent years the Canadian Football League seemed to belong to the West (once Calvillo and Cahoon were out of the picture); but this year, the Eastern teams are coming up with surprises.

First the Montreal Alouettes humbling the Calgary Stampeders, last year's Grey Cup winners. And then consider this weekend's BC Lions-Ottawa Redblacks game. What we saw was new Lions coach Jeff Tedford chewing a lot of gum while Henry Burris and Brad Sinopoli chewed up a lot of turf.

Looking at the lineups this season, one wonders what GMs were thinking when they traded Nick Lewis, Mo Price, Ernest Jackson, Chris Williams, Greg Ellingson, Sinopoli, et al. for younger possibilities. Some dream of the future? Maybe the 2018 season?

Meanwhile, in Calgary, political leaders gathered, as they must, for the Stampede. Somebody has to tell Stephen Harper that good guys do not wear the black hat.

For PD Sports, this is Slap Maxwell.

The Glorious Fourth

Here it is, the Glorious Fourth of July--light the fireworks, wave the flag, give the downbeat to the marching bands!

The Fourth of July, celebrated throughout the fifty states, although with less enthusiasm in Texas.

The Fourth of July, claimed as their birthday by Louis Armstrong and George M. Cohan. Fact checkers may quibble, but as the newspaper editor says in "The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance," "When the legend becomes fact, print the legend."

Ah, yes, the Glorious Fourth, full of meaning for those of us with Bad Axe roots!

So let us sing:

I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy
Yankee Doodle, do or die!
A real live nephew of my Uncle Sam,
Born on the Fourth of July!

I've a Yankee Doodle sweetheart,
She's my Yankee Doodle joy.
Yankee Doodle came to London,
Riding on a pony--
I am that Yankee Doodle boy!

Politics and Ice Cream

Political scraps of the week:

Donald Trump has cancelled his plans for a vacation in Mazatlan.

Following the resounding "No" vote on the transportation referendum, several Lower Mainland mayors were seen on the TransCanada Highway trying to thumb a ride.

And as ice cream wagons patrolled neighbourhoods, with Scott Joplin's "The Entertainer" drawing mobs of children, one perspiring father said, "When does the frozen daiquiri wagon come around?"

Snow Dreams

It's played usually in December, but "White Christmas" is really a warm weather song.

No, wait, hear me out. Here's the situation: the Crosby character is sitting on the steps of his dressing room in the middle of what passes for winter in Southern California, and trying to cool off. So this is the verse he sings:

The sun is shining, the grass is green
The orange and the palm trees sway.

There's never been such a day
in Beverly Hills, L.A.
But it's December twenty-fourth

And I am longing to be up North.

Okay, now pour yourself a Slushie and come in on the chorus.

Oh! Canada!

Here it is Canada Day, 148 years after the big Charlottetown clambake.  Gosh--148 years--where did the time go?

Many celebrations, of course, and none bigger than the day's events on Parliament Hill. Prime Minister Stephen Harper in his Sir Elton John mode ("We don't agree on everything, of course") is scheduled to perform "With a Little Help from My (Rapidly Disappearing) Friends," backed by the Stevettes: Rona Ambrose, Lisa Raitt and Leona Aglukkaq.

Meanwhile, on another stage, Elizabeth May and the May-Bees will sing "Hit the Road, Steve!"

Face painting will be offered, in all the national party colors. Orange and black are the current favourites, and, noting their leadership in the polls, NDP organizers will present a demonstration of poll dancing.

Challengers are lining up for the John A. Macdonald Chug-a-Lug Contest, and ticket sales are booming for the "Win a Seat in the Senate" lottery.

And for relaxation from all this busting patriotic activity, Alberta energy producers invite celebrants to their hospitality suite. "C'mon in," they say, "and get oiled."

"O Canada," said a First Nations chief, "our home and native land. Emphasis on 'our'."