Canada's Public Safety Minister, Vic Toews, winner of the Hulk Hogan lookalike contest, announced today that inmates of the country's prisons will be required to pay for room and board. Questioned about this unprecedented move, Minister Toews said, "What would you expect, in a four-star prison?"
In Washington, President Obama declared himself in favor of same sex marriages. Nevertheless, Speaker John Boehner and Rep. Paul Ryan said "we are just good friends."
Kevin Krueger, an MLA who makes up in perspiration what he lacks in sophistication, today attacked NDP leader Adrian Dix. This puts Krueger in contention for the Harry Bloy Award. Premier Christy Clark had no comment on Krueger's remarks when she bounced on camera in the manner of the young woman in "Up in the Air" who wanted to fire people on-line.
Finally, Prime Minister Stephen Harper explained to people that "We are a majority government. We are doing what we want...uh..I mean what Canadians want. Or at least what almost forty percent of Canadians want."
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