New Year's Resolutions

Here we are on the cusp of 2016, and once again, many will be making New Year's resolutions.

Here are ours:

1. No more Stephen Harper jokes. (But watch out, Rona Ambrose--only national political leader named for a home construction outlet).

2. Despite the lineup of candidates for the Republican presidential nomination, no more referring to my mother's birthplace as the Demented States of America.

3. Forgiveness of football teams and coaches for last season's fumbles. We will wear, in rotation, jerseys of the BC Lions, Saskatchewan Roughriders and Seattle Seahawks.

4. A fixed warm smile for all. Thanks to Botox.

Best before date for New Year's resolutions: January 3.