Privacy Protection

The federal government (read:  Stephen Harper) has moved swiftly to end unwarranted invasions of citizens' privacy.  The new Privacy Protection Program--Privy-Pro--will cancel the current mandatory census form, which includes such questions as "Are you currently dating anyone?" and "What is your favorite hallucinatory drug?"

Some critics complain that the census is essential to the national economy and many other aspects of Canadian life, but Ralph Dimsdale of the Tax Relief Foundation applauds the government's move.  "We are all for restricting government probing into our private lives," said Dimsdale. 

Dimsdale would like to see the Privacy Protection Program expanded, to include elimination of the income tax form.  "Why should the government know how much money we have?  Let's make reporting our income voluntary.  Demanding to know how much we make is a gross invasion of privacy." 

Otis Philbrick had another suggestion.  "Have you noticed," he said, "that some restaurants are now letting customers pay what they think their meal is worth?  We could do this with government, as well.  Let people pay as much in taxes as they think the government deserves."

A spokesman for the Prime Minister's office said these suggestions would be carefully considered once the government concludes its negotiations with the Flat Earth Society.