For sale: Heritage Prison, prime waterfront location

Public Safety Minister Vic Toews (rhymes with knaves) announced today that the federal government will close the maximum security prison in Kingston, Ontario and a prison of somewhat lower security (minimum of serial axe-murderers) in Quebec. 

The question in many minds was "What are you going to do with all the evildoers resident in those palatial pokeys?"  

"Ha ha," said Minister Toevs, responding to one journalist's question, "No, we are not going to appoint them to the Senate.

"We have a better idea," he said. "Actually it was Steve's idea. We;'re going to take all those miscreants..."

"Yes?"

"...and stick them in Stornoway."