Post-Olympics Clear-out Sale

It has been revealed that many of the players involved in 2010 Olympics hockey were not in attendance for the closing ceremonies, a fact that has sparked cries of outrage from the sorts of people who e-mail sports pages signing themselves "Troo Bloo Canuck."  They feel that athletes who failed to attend the wind-up gala should be stripped of their medals and, if not made to face a firing squad, be condemned to sail the world forever on a ship that never docks, the punishment suffered by the title character in "The Man Without a Country," he having been  disenfranchised for whistling "Salt Peanuts" during the playing of "The Star-Spangled Banner" or some equally heinous offence.  Further to the hockey brouhaha, outraged fans are muttering that perhaps the game should be dropped from future Olympics, to be replaced by something like volleyball on ice.

The Digressions crew also missed the closing ceremonies, having previously been committed to a sauerkraut tasting, but we do have a report from faithful correspondent Whitfield Wallaby, who writes as follows:  "When the Canada-US hockey game ended, I went in search of a bracing beverage, but, as the liquor vendors had locked their doors at two o'clock, I was compelled to settle for a bottle of almond extract.  Falling into an altered state, I dreamed I was trapped at an event populated by giant beavers and dancing Mounties.  I thought I witnessed poor William Shatner delivering lame jokes and wishing that the floor beneath him would open up, or that he could morph into Denny Crane.  It was a frightening mirage, part 1950s Vegas club show, part early CBC-TV variety.  I thought I heard Ryan Miller say 'Losing the game was disappointing, but this is a nightmare'."

Meanwhile, the auctioning of thousands of items of Olympics memorabilia has begun, with buyers willing to pay up to $600 for a hockey puck.  Here at Pointless Digressions we have, for sale to the highest bidder, half  a poppy seed roll left behind by a member of the Azerbaijan team.  Genuine tooth marks!

Finally, a person who wishes to remain anonymous wants to know what he is offered for Sidney Crosby's gloves.